Hyperbolic and generalizing as that title may be, I’m starting to believe that trust issues and women are more synonymous than Donald Trump and his toupÃ©. I used to get upset when I ran across a woman with trust issues but in my old(er) age, I’ve come to realize that it’s nearly impossible for women to NOT have trust issues. And do you know why? No? Cool, I’ll tell you.
Women don’t even trust themselves.
Let that glisten for a minute.
Now before you go all Jack Bauer on me, hear me out.
One of the most prominent themes that’s come across from the gazillion questions I receive as a relationship advisor at https://www.loveawake.com (and in the real world and various other websites for that matter) is that women have no earthly idea what’s going on in a man’s mind. But we are all gifted with a gut feeling. All of us. And women either choose to ignore it altogether for fear of it being true or refuse to acknowledge its guidance. Women don’t trust their own instincts…or at the very least hope that it’s wrong (even if 99 percent of the time their gut feeling would have been the right one had they chosen to acknowledge it).
But hoping that its wrong implies a certain lack of trust in its response. Or more simply, I might be wrong so let me ask any and all random comers about my ridiculous situation. I don’t need a second opinion, I need a 2nd through 100th opinion…until I get the response that I want OR I just give up and realize that I’m not going to get what I want.
So maybe it’s not even trust. Maybe 99 percent of all women are just masochists. Which jives well with my assertion some time back that women were the most optimistic beings on the planet. (Sidenote: That might actually be deer. How many deer have you seen dead on the side of the road because they were optimistic enough to think that they’d win at Frogger? RIP Bambi.)
I’ve often felt that if most of the women who ask us questions just trusted their gut instinct, there’d be a lot less confusion. But it seems that most women are either completely clueless about whether a man likes them or not despite any and all evidence to the the negative or affirmative.
The main culprit here is the innate desire to not be made a fool. I’ve often contended that political wives aren’t really upset at the infidelity, they’re upset at the embarrassment of being found out. Cheat…just don’t get caught. Nobody wants to be the fool and maybe that’s why women refuse to listen to themselves so much. It’s not just trust, they just want to make sure they get as many data points as possible to make an informed decision. Except, they already know the answer most of the time. So well then, yeah, trust.
Ladies, that little voice inside your head that’s telling you that something isn’t right, isn’t wrong. Because if you’re right you’re right, but if you’re wrong, you could have been right, so you’re never wrong.