YOUR OPENING STATEMENT SHOULD NEVER BE ANYTHING BUT:
For your information and for the record, Your Honor; I am here today by special appearance; I make NO WAIVERS and I RESERVE ALL OF MY RIGHTS and LIBERTIES.
MY name is ________________________, (if in family court over children add, I am the custodial/non-custodial parent of ______, ________ your kids.)
The only thing you have to protect you is the RECORD. USE IT.
Say, "Could you please repeat that for the record?" over and over and over. Say it. Say it. Say it again. If they say something stupid that helps your case, get them to say it again. Ask them in a sickeningly nice voice and call them by their fancy names. Smile and while you say it out loud, in your mind say, "Could you please repeat for the record that you are a lying fuck?" If you want it in the record, say, "I would like to repeat that for the record." And then say what you need to say.
Do not allow them to rush you. They will do it anyway. Be very polite. Take your time. Think. You have a right to question, to speak, to understand. Document everything you can. If you feel rushed and you can't stop it, try to say it into the record. Speak the truth into the record.
This is NOT EASY to do. They will badger you, bully you. They will force you to get off track. Have EVERYTHING important on COLORFUL note cards IN FRONT OF YOU so that you can add everything at the end or when it is your turn to talk. Let them bully; don't let it get to you. Just keep your list and get it in there. Take the best notes you can; bring friends and witnesses so that you can discuss what happened and what was said afterward. They have take even my pencil and ability to write notes in court away from me. Be prepared for anything.
LET THEM KNOW THAT YOU ARE PRESERVING YOUR RIGHT TO APPEAL. OBJECT and GIVE A REASON or an authority for your OBJECTION. Object to each thing, individually and on the record.
MAKE SURE THAT YOUR PUBLIC PRETENDER UNDERSTANDS THAT YOU KNOW WHAT HE IS SUPPOSED TO BE DOING, AND THAT YOU INTEND TO HOLD HIM ACCOUNTABLE, AND THAT ALTHOUGH IT MAKES YOU BOTH A LITTLE UNCOMFORTABLE, IT IS REALLY BEST THAT HE KNOWS THAT YOU KNOW THAT HE KNOWS THAT YOU KNOW THAT YOU CAN SUE HIM FOR INEFFECTIVE ASSISSTANCE OF COUNCIL, WHICH MEANS THAT HE FOLLOWED ORDERS OF HIS BOSS, (WHICH SHOULD TECHNICALLY BE YOU, BUT IS NOT YOU, BUT IT IS, IN FACT THE COURT/STATE ITSELF, WHO IS ULTIMATELY YOUR ADVERSARY) - AND THAT IF HE DOES NOTHING TO HELP YOU EVEN THOUGH HE WAS SUPPOSED TO, YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO HOLD HIM ACCOUNTABLE, WHICH PUTS YOU ALL IN QUITE A PICKLE BUT SO LONG AS YOU ARE AWARE OF IT IT'S THEIR PROBLEM AND NOT YOURS!!!